Modern Mating

When Technology and the Sexes Collide

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Adult Friend Finder in the news

AdultFriendFinder, which bills itself as the “World’s largest sex and swinger personals site,” has been in the news lately. In addition to being the most popular of the dating sites dedicated primarily to libidinous pursuits, it was also the site Neil Entwistle - the British man accused of murdering his wife and infant daughter in Massachusetts - used to cultivate a little extra-marital action.

After exploring Entwistle's computer records, prosecutors found email correspondence between Entwistle and a woman he found on AFF. Entwistle was "looking for a bit more fun in the bedroom" and a "very discreet relationship just for fun." "Discreet", of course, being the code word for "I'm married and any sex is strictly on the side."

AdultFriendFinder is the top "adult personals" site, according to Websearch. In an interview with OnlinePersonalsWatch, its founder, Dr. Andrew Conru describes how the site came to fruition:
"Shortly after we went online with FriendFinder, people started posting explicit photos that pushed the envelope of a friendly dating site. Our first response was simply to delete profiles with explicit photos in them. Later on, instead of fighting the persistent trend, we decided to go with it, and we created a new site called AdultFriendFinder. It started out as a kind of release valve for the more erotic adventurers. But it was so well received, it just grew like kudzu from there. "

It's not surprising that Entwistle went on AdultFriendFinder if he was looking for sexual action beyond his marriage. AFF knows its market well, and offers its member the capacity to search for partners for activities such as group sex, erotic chat, or a discreet relationship. It doesn’t discriminate on the basis of sexual preference, claiming that gay or straight, it offers the sexiest men and women. Of course, the site has greater aspirations. AdultFriendFinder wants to be “even more than a sex site. We want people to use the site as a way to grow and develop sexually.” With almost 20 million active members, at least some must believe that threesomes and moresomes are a road to enlightenment. Where Entwistle is concerned, however, the AdultFriendFinder connection demonstrates a willingness to keep secrets from friends and family, and shows that both his marriage and his judgement were very flawed.